I told Alex yesterday that almost all of my Alaska memories have him in them. It's true. I wonder how my view of Alaska and my experiences would have differed if I hadn't met him before I moved. The only time I haven't known him, or have him in my memories of my Alaska, is the time I came to visit in 2005. Our lives were very different then, and our paths would have never crossed had things not dramatically changed in both our lives.
I know I'd still live here, even if I hadn't met him. I'd be living in the condo in Anchorage. K would be going to school at East. I still would have gotten out and done winter activities to keep me busy. I probably would have started MEETinANCHORAGE much sooner. I'd still need a 12-step program for my berry picking addiction. I'd probably still be working at Hope. God forbid! I'd be dating. I probably wouldn't be dating exclusively, or just one person. I probably wouldn't be in a relationship. I'd probably be seeing more of Alaska on my own and following the nomadic nature and independent streak that brought me here in the first place.
I would still love Alaska just as much, but I would have really been missing out, and never have known it. I've experienced so much here with Alex, and have really grown and benefitted from having him and N in my life. I wonder sometimes if they know how appreciated and loved they are.
So, my Alaska memories, as they are, are filled with laughter, fun, love, beautiful views, wonderful experiences, and domestic bliss. Never thought that last one would be in there, but it's part of my Alaska, and an unexpected and wonderful part of my experiences here that I wouldn't trade for anything.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Spring in Alaska
So, this is spring in Alaska?I'd been told when I moved here that spring was the ugliest time of year in Alaska. The snow melts, the streets and sidewalks get flooded with nasty, muddy slush, and it's generally miserable. This spring, I'm told, is not the "normal" spring in Alaska.
The snow melted gradually, and the water evaporated quickly to keep up with the thaw. The trash that lay beneath the snow all winter was exposed slowly, and cleaned up off of the downtown Anchorage streets as it appeared. I even saw someone sweeping the alley behind my jobsite today.
I went down to the inlet for a walk from work, and the flowers were already blooming and the trees were budding. The snow is almost entirely melted from every part of the city. The weather has been beautiful, in the mid fifties. I anticipate absolutely beautiful weather Sunday night when Alex and I have friends over for dinner.
Ok, so I still miss winter and look forward to it returning, but maybe this spring thing isn't so bad.
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Days to Remember
There are days that, simply by virtue of having something tragic take place on their date in American history, live on as numbers that everyone as a whole recognizes when the number is said. When I say 9/11 (Twin Towers and Pentagon hit by terrorists), everyone knows what I'm talking about. Then, there's 4/20 (Columbine Massacre), 10/12 (USS Cole attacked in the Yemeni port) and now 4/16. April 16 will be known forever as the day that one lone gunman attacked at the campus of Virginia Tech and took the lives of 32 people, before taking his own life. I don't think that any of us can understand what would cause a person to do something so insane as to take a gun, kill 32 innocent people, then take their own life. And, what makes it even more crazy is that massacres like this seem to only be noticed in this country when they happen in this country.
Every day in Iraq there are suicide bombers attacking buses, schools, people waiting in line at job centers, people at home eating dinner at their kitchen tables with their families or people going to pray at a mosque. Those attacks receive perhaps one article in our American newspapers, if not just a few sentences. More often than not, we don't even ever hear about the attacks in Iraq. On a daily basis in African nations, the base of power is constantly shifting, pitting local militia men against warlord types who massacre entire villages just for the fun of it, raping, pillaging and desimating entire populations. Again, maybe it warrants a paragraph or two in our papers here.
What makes the dates here in America matter more than the dates in other "less civilized" countries? Why are we so shocked when people in our "civilized" society behave so uncivilized? I think the reason why those dates matter so much to us is that they remind us that we too are human. We are base, crude, hurtful and animalistic. Our capitalist society doesn't really set us above anyone, that's a myth we perpetuate to feel safe. We aren't any better than any other nation, or safer than any other nation. It only takes one person, one event, one "human" being to bring us back to reality and remind us that we are fragile and vulnerable, not an island super power existing in Utopia above the rest of the huddled masses. I pray for all the families of those killed in the Va Tech killings. I also pray for all the families of those killed in every country where people act like base, crazy "humans."
If we concentrated more on making every day important, and looked for reasons to do something good for the population on a daily basis, maybe we could replace the days that are remembered for horrific events with days that are remembered for love, joy and peace. I know it will never happen, but wouldn't it be nice to remember a date simply because nothing bad happened on that date. Remembered because there was no bad news, no death anywhere. Remembered it because it was a date when everything went right. Wouldn't it be nice to have a string of days to remember like that. A month of days that turned into a year of days. Those would be dates I'd gladly mark on my calendar. Days to celebrate, instead of mourn.
Every day in Iraq there are suicide bombers attacking buses, schools, people waiting in line at job centers, people at home eating dinner at their kitchen tables with their families or people going to pray at a mosque. Those attacks receive perhaps one article in our American newspapers, if not just a few sentences. More often than not, we don't even ever hear about the attacks in Iraq. On a daily basis in African nations, the base of power is constantly shifting, pitting local militia men against warlord types who massacre entire villages just for the fun of it, raping, pillaging and desimating entire populations. Again, maybe it warrants a paragraph or two in our papers here.
What makes the dates here in America matter more than the dates in other "less civilized" countries? Why are we so shocked when people in our "civilized" society behave so uncivilized? I think the reason why those dates matter so much to us is that they remind us that we too are human. We are base, crude, hurtful and animalistic. Our capitalist society doesn't really set us above anyone, that's a myth we perpetuate to feel safe. We aren't any better than any other nation, or safer than any other nation. It only takes one person, one event, one "human" being to bring us back to reality and remind us that we are fragile and vulnerable, not an island super power existing in Utopia above the rest of the huddled masses. I pray for all the families of those killed in the Va Tech killings. I also pray for all the families of those killed in every country where people act like base, crazy "humans."
If we concentrated more on making every day important, and looked for reasons to do something good for the population on a daily basis, maybe we could replace the days that are remembered for horrific events with days that are remembered for love, joy and peace. I know it will never happen, but wouldn't it be nice to remember a date simply because nothing bad happened on that date. Remembered because there was no bad news, no death anywhere. Remembered it because it was a date when everything went right. Wouldn't it be nice to have a string of days to remember like that. A month of days that turned into a year of days. Those would be dates I'd gladly mark on my calendar. Days to celebrate, instead of mourn.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Calm After the Storm
We had a storm last night. I'd sent Nicholas outside to clean up the backyard, and he sheepishly opened the back door and said, "Do you still want me to clean up the yard? It's hailing or something." I hadn't noticed. I looked up through the sky lights. Sure enough, it was hailing.
It hailed for a little while, then started to snow. God was teasing me, letting me think we had just a little bit more of winter left. The skies blackened. Then, just as quickly as it moved in, the storm was gone. The sun came out. The sky turned back to blue. The dark clouds moved on.
When I took the kids to get dinner, I could see the darkness heading towards the horizon, towards the west where the sun was beginning to set. I had to take a picture (or 30). I drove the kids (complaining all the while) up to the top of Skyline Drive, up to the Mount Baldy base. I walked out onto the snow (slush) and started snapping pictures. There were others with me there, admiring one of the last sunsets we'd be able to see before 10 pm, before the nights get so long they flow seamlessly to dawn, only a brief dusk separating night from day. The sunset was amazing. The storm clouds looked like they were going to gobble up the sun as it was setting, they were dark and ominious. But, just where the Sleeping Lady lay on the horizon, the sky was clear, undisturbed but for a few clouds. The sunset was absolutely breathtaking. As the sun descended below the horizon, a lone paraglider dipped across the sky, right into my camera's view finder range. I had to capture him in flight.
The Sleeping Lady lay undisturbed by the approaching storm, man could fly, the trees were budding with the first promise of life after a long winter, and I felt like I was ascending somehow. All was right with the world at that moment.
I love Alaska!
It hailed for a little while, then started to snow. God was teasing me, letting me think we had just a little bit more of winter left. The skies blackened. Then, just as quickly as it moved in, the storm was gone. The sun came out. The sky turned back to blue. The dark clouds moved on.
When I took the kids to get dinner, I could see the darkness heading towards the horizon, towards the west where the sun was beginning to set. I had to take a picture (or 30). I drove the kids (complaining all the while) up to the top of Skyline Drive, up to the Mount Baldy base. I walked out onto the snow (slush) and started snapping pictures. There were others with me there, admiring one of the last sunsets we'd be able to see before 10 pm, before the nights get so long they flow seamlessly to dawn, only a brief dusk separating night from day. The sunset was amazing. The storm clouds looked like they were going to gobble up the sun as it was setting, they were dark and ominious. But, just where the Sleeping Lady lay on the horizon, the sky was clear, undisturbed but for a few clouds. The sunset was absolutely breathtaking. As the sun descended below the horizon, a lone paraglider dipped across the sky, right into my camera's view finder range. I had to capture him in flight.
The Sleeping Lady lay undisturbed by the approaching storm, man could fly, the trees were budding with the first promise of life after a long winter, and I felt like I was ascending somehow. All was right with the world at that moment.
I love Alaska!
Tick Tock of Time
April 9, 07
Kaylee couldn't sleep last night. The snow is melting off of the roof, water dripping onto the ground. The noise kept her awake. She wanted me to lay down with her and rub her back to help her fall asleep.
The sound of the water hitting the ground didn't sound like a "drip." Where did that even come from, that it "drips?" It sounded like a ticking clock. As melancholic as I am about winter passing, it just added to my feeling that I'm counting down time till there's no more snow. With each "tick" of the falling water droplets, I felt winter slipping away. The melancholy is slowly leaving though. I'm now looking for the buds on the trees that signal spring. We also "spring" cleaned the house yesterday, which got me thinking WHY there's such a frenzy to clean once the snow starts to melt and the days get longer. Is it an internal drive to clean the cave or den, to make way for the bounties of spring, summer and fall to come? I know when the ticking of the water stops, spring will be here. The countdown will be over, and I'll be starting another countdown, till winter comes again.
Kaylee couldn't sleep last night. The snow is melting off of the roof, water dripping onto the ground. The noise kept her awake. She wanted me to lay down with her and rub her back to help her fall asleep.
The sound of the water hitting the ground didn't sound like a "drip." Where did that even come from, that it "drips?" It sounded like a ticking clock. As melancholic as I am about winter passing, it just added to my feeling that I'm counting down time till there's no more snow. With each "tick" of the falling water droplets, I felt winter slipping away. The melancholy is slowly leaving though. I'm now looking for the buds on the trees that signal spring. We also "spring" cleaned the house yesterday, which got me thinking WHY there's such a frenzy to clean once the snow starts to melt and the days get longer. Is it an internal drive to clean the cave or den, to make way for the bounties of spring, summer and fall to come? I know when the ticking of the water stops, spring will be here. The countdown will be over, and I'll be starting another countdown, till winter comes again.
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